Back to reality

I can't believe that it's ready the end of August, which means time for me to go back to work.  My first day back wasn't supposed to be until Monday August 29 since I planned on taking 12 full weeks off.  However, that would put me back to work on the Monday of close week, which is my crazy busy week that usually includes a few days of very long hours.  That would have been rough on me for numerous reasons, including the fact that I've never been away from Madeline for more than 3 hours.  Therefore, I decided to ease into the swing of things by starting back today and working half days for the rest of this week before going back full-time on Monday.

Needless to say, it was a rough morning around our house.  Mathew has gotten used to me brewing his coffee, packing his lunch, and having his egg sandwich ready to go so all he has to do is get dressed, grab his things, and head out the door.  After that, I get Maddie dressed, feed the dogs, get myself breakfast, and go about my nice morning routine, which usually includes cuddling with Maddie while I check out what's going on in the world.  Obviously, we're going to need to get into a much different routine now.

For several weeks now, Maddie has been waking up at 6 AM to eat.  After that, she does her morning "exercises" while smiling and shining those bright blue eyes at me, as you can see here...

Of course, that was not the case today.  After waking up hungry at 5 AM, she fell back asleep on my chest and did not want to wake up, which made getting up for me about a million times more difficult.  Who wants to get up and go to work when your 11 week old baby girl is cuddled up like a sweet little angel in your arms?  Let the tears begin...

By the time I was dressed and had Maddie's bag packed for her first day at grandma and grandpa's house, she was still sound asleep on our bed.  Instead of waking her up to get dressed, I decided to just put her in her car seat in her pj's since my mom never gets to see her in all the cute pj's she bought her.  Maddie and I headed out the door and left poor Mat to take care of himself and the dogs.  I wonder if he had time to make himself breakfast or if he went to work hungry after running around getting the puppies situated for the day...

On the drive to my mom's house, I made a list in my head of all reasons why me going back to work was a good thing, aside from the money.  At the top of the list was the fact that chasing a little girl around should help keep my parents young.  After all, my Grandma Margaret (after whom Madeline Margaret is named) didn't live to be 96 just sitting around...she was the one that baby-sat my three siblings and I our entire lives.  Great memories of my grandma and imagining all the wonderful times Maddie is going to have with her grandma helped cheer me up.  Then I arrived at my parents' house, and the realization hit me (hard) that I had to leave my little baby girl that looked like this a mere 11 1/2 weeks ago...

Having been through this four times herself, my mom wasn't surprised to see the tears in my eyes as I walked up to the house.  However, I could see her excitement as I know she has been looking forward to getting to baby-sit Madeline.  After all, that was one of the reasons she retired in May, and I couldn't be more grateful to her and my dad for volunteering to watch our little girl.  As hard as today was, I can't imagine how hard it would have been if I would have had to leave her with a stranger.  She immediately took Miss Maddie out of her car seat so she could stretch out (and because my mom loves holding her), and I know Maddie couldn't be in better hands.  Not only is she getting to spend time with her grandparents, but an added bonus is the fact that my mom is a retired nurse.  After chatting with my mom for a few minutes, who did a great job of helping cheer me up, I grabbed a handful of tissues, gave Madeline a kiss good-bye, and headed off to Payless.